I HATE TOM BRADY

I wrote the following article during the 2005 season for my campus newspaper. It is still very true today and I think most people will get a kick out of it. And just for the record, I am a Raiders fan.

I absolutely, positively hate the New England Patriots. I hate their logo, I hate their quarterback, I hate their owner and their stadium is named after a razor company. I hate them. And worst of all they win too damn much; they’ve become the Yankees of football. But I’m not here to talk about the Yankees, that’ll just open up another can of worms.

Hate is the best form of admiration, not imitation. Quarterback Tom Brady has everything a man could possibly ask for. But I’m tired of hearing his so-called “Cinderella” story. Of how he was selected in the sixth round in the NFL Draft, of how he jumped rope as a kid to keep his feet quick, and now how he reminds former NFL coach and current broadcaster, John Madden, of Joe Montana.

Let’s review: Brady has three Super Bowl rings, a very hot girlfriend in Bridget Moynahan and enough money to feed all the hungry children in Ethiopia. I hate him, but remember hate is the best form of admiration.

Owner and business tycoon Robert Kraft is an extremely rich man who day-by-day reminds me more and more of Yankees owner George Steinbrenner. He sits up in his owner’s box in Gillette Stadium with his fancy suit and does absolutely nothing wrong. His lack of poor behavior bothers me even more; I mean he’s actually a good guy. He and his wife contribute to so many charities that it’s become nearly impossible to really hate the guy.

Except for his recent slip up. In August, Kraft went to Russia and met with President Vladimir Putin who asked to see Kraft’s newest Super Bowl ring. The ring is worth over $20,000 and has 124 diamonds in it. Kraft could officially open up his own Tiffany’s with his three Super Bowl rings that certainly have more than 300 diamonds. Kraft took the ring off his finger and Putin robbed him! Putin put it in his pocket, and Kraft claims it was a gift for the Russian president. Now one of two things happened here: Kraft didn’t have the balls to ask for it back or is so rich that he had no problem giving it away. Both instances bother me tremendously, and gave me a good reason to hate the rich man.

I’m sure Jets fans have been loving this and have probably been screaming J-E-T-S, JETS JETS JETS. But, as a Raiders’ fan, my hate runs deep for Head coach Bill Belichick and his smug smile. It gets my blood boiling to remember him jumping up and down five years ago on a snowy night in New England after a 45-yard field goal by Adam Vinatieri.

And while the kick only tied the game at 10, it should have never been attempted. On the previous play “Pretty Boy” Brady dropped back to pass in what was going to be known as the “Snow Bowl,” and cornerback Charles Woodson blitzed Brady and sacked him. The ball came loose and the Raiders recovered.

The Raider Nation was going ballistic, but the play was challenged and overturned. The referees claimed that Brady was trying to tuck the ball, instead of throw it, which made it an incomplete pass and not a fumble. But there was no such rule, they made it up, not until the following year did the NFL put that rule into the rulebook. The Patriots would go on to win in overtime. The infamous “Tuck Game” at Foxboro Stadium (as it was named before rights were sold to Gillette) led to my hatred of this organization.

And what hurts the most is that they dominated the Raiders last Thursday and I know after watching the whole game that they will again win the Super Bowl this year. Most analysts claimed that the Pats would have defensive troubles because they lost cornerback Ty Law and linebacker Tedy Bruschi, but no such troubles exist. So right now I am calling the attention of all Jets fans so I can say: Shut up with your stupid chants because you don’t have a prayer. Nobody does.